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clean living

Frugal Living, Lifestyle, Small Business

The Knuckle Dragging Neanderthal Meets Uber and Airbnb

Tax Collector? They opened an office for me when I visited Florida!

Earlier this year Mrs. Accountant and I attended Camp Mustache in Gainesville, Florida. We were offered a ride to the Camp, but we also had several additional days planned around the event. Renting a car in such a situation is expensive since the car would just sit there for days while my wallet was financially abused.

My youngest daughter rolled her eyes when I mentioned I needed the phone number to the Gainesville taxi service. She grabbed my phone and started working on it. This is an unusual event for anyone who knows me. I use my phone as a phone. Period. I don’t care about, nor do I want to know about any of the other things smart phone can do. I make my own breakfast, thank you.

In a few minutes my daughter completed her assault on my virgin phone. She added an app to my phone. (To this day I have no idea what an app is. Whenever the kids talk about apps I joke that we are living on The Planet of the Apps.)

I told her it was nice of her to put an app on my phone, but I’ll never use it. Another eye roll. “Here, dad,” she said pointing to the Uber icon now conveniently located in the middle of my screen. “All you do is touch the icon and tell the phone where you want to go.”

Huh?

Well, my fingers don’t work well with all the small letters and stuff on a phone so I have made a habit of avoiding the issue. Now I find out I can talk to my phone and it responds. Awesome!

I know, I know. You readers are rolling your eyes like my daughter. This stuff has probably been around for a long time. Somehow I missed it. I refuse to blame my stubbornness on “missing it” even though it is probably the reason why.




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Tough Times Make You Rich

Berkshire Hathaway Inc. held their annual meeting this past weekend. Warren Buffett noted some of his failures over the previous decades (missing Amazon, for example) and Charlie Munger added Google as a big miss. Both men agreed they’d continue missing many opportunities in the future. Buffett and Munger made it clear they learn more from their mistakes than from their successes. They felt winning was a poor teacher as it fooled people into thinking they were right.

Steve Jobs had some Syrian blood and was raised by adoptive parents. Armed with only this information it would be hard to imagine a path that would lead to Jobs creating a company which would become the largest on the planet by the time of his early death at age 56. The odds were stacked against Jobs, yet he rose above the travails and changed the world.

Elon Musk was born in South Africa. His parents divorced when he was nine. It would be hard to see a path for this young boy where PayPal would be part of his future followed by SpaceX, Tesla, Solar City and a growing list of additional companies.

Tough times. We hear about them all the time. Rarely is found a successful person who doesn’t have baggage in the closet. Show me someone who never had problems and I’ll show you someone who is mediocre. The exceptions are exceedingly rare.

Yet, most people have hard luck stories in their past. Why does a difficult time in life, especially early on, define so many successful people? And why do people with the odds stacked in their favor frequently end up average at best?


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Frugal Living, Lifestyle

Your Garbage is Killing Me

Dreams are what make life worth living. As the years stack up we can look back at our lives and see the progression as life moves toward where we are today. Mistakes of yesteryear lose the edge of anxiety while still providing plenty of experience to draw from. What seemed like a good idea back then is painfully obvious today.

And then there are the things which blindside us. A perfect plan executed with precision yields the results we want before life throws one of the curve balls we hear so much about. Today’s story is about a man, me, who did everything right in this instance and still took a swift foot to the crotch.

So the record is straight, it’s your fault. Well, not exactly your fault unless you live in NE Wisconsin, but still your fault because you did it in your own community. Shame on you for acting the way you do. The worst part is you hurt neighbors and friends and now it will be your turn to stand still with feet slightly apart as the community takes a running start as they drive their foot home.

You’re not going to like what I have to say, but you must hear it. This is important. Your happiness is at stake.




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Lifestyle

Sleep Yourself Rich

Tax season is over. The long days and endless weeks are finally at an end. It’s time for a nap.

In my younger days I also ran long stretches with limited sleep. Farming is intense during spring planting and autumn harvesting; college was late night studying or visiting with friends; and now taxes provide me with twelve weeks of unrelenting work each year.

Society idolizes people who run with limited amounts of sleep. It is a badge of honor to pound your mind and body mercilessly and do it with lack of sleep.

As tax season clawed toward the finish line my performance was no longer acceptable. The amount of work I completed was down and concerns over accuracy started to pop up. Nobody can perform at peak while fighting fatigue and lack of sleep. Nobody.

I call these bursts of hyper activity “marathon runs”. Tax season is my current annual marathon run. It appeals to me because I have manic depression and I learned a long time ago autumn is a bad time and springtime is power time. It was a natural fit. The disease doesn’t always cooperate, but I have learned to control it enough to use it to my benefit.

Yet, the risks of long hours without sleep are a real problem. Lack of sleep is a leading cause of transportation accidents. Even if you read the news poorly you have heard stories of airline pilots, ship captains, train conductors and barges in catastrophic disasters due to lack of sleep. Doctors frequently perform surgery in the morning for a reason. Only emergency surgery is performed later in the day.




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Early Retirement, Frugal Living, Lifestyle, Small Business

The Dangers of a Side Gig

Tax season is officially over and not a moment too soon. As much as I love the work, when months go by without a day off it begins to wear on me. The worst part is the sitting. Too many hours planted in a chair coupled with sleep deprivation and health is not getting the attention it needs.

Loving something as much as I love tax work is also a challenge for people around me. Mrs. Accountant is an angel, allowing me the opportunity every year to disappear for months to help complete strangers and semi-strangers with their tax, accounting and financial problems. My daughters have learned from an early age dad is a very intense man when it comes to his work.

Work has never been a four letter word for me. (Considering my profession you would think I could count to four better.) Growing up on a farm meant everything was work, but not work. Running to the creek to fish was something you did. Planting in spring was fun, not really work. Harvesting was an addiction; sleep was hard to achieve until the crops were off the field. I know of no greater pleasure than watching a barn filled with bales of hay, placed there by my own hands. There is no greater thrill than to see the milk cooler fill each day to the rim. A full bulk tank meant money, and therefore, life. It was a good life and I had no idea what the real world was like outside my vision horizon.




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Early Retirement, Lifestyle

Crime and Punishment

Tax season is racing toward the finish line. There are 5 days left, including today. I’ll work every day, even Easter Sunday to get as many returns out before the due date.

The stack of tax returns on my desk is taller than I hoped by this time. Incomplete files are put to the side until all documents are in. All too often clients piecemeal information. This forces me to put these accounts at the bottom of the stack so I can focus on files with all their documents. Every time I open a file I review all the prior work done to ensure nothing is missed. Dribbling in data wastes a lot of time.

The good news is that every return with complete data in the office by April 1st will be done by the due date. In fact, most returns in the office by April 10th will be done on time. There will be the rare exception due to required research.

The days are long and I am beyond exhausted. There is a place past the “second wind” where motivation is based on sheer willpower. That is where I am now. I live for this last week like an addict anticipating her fix. Each year as the New Year approaches the taste coats my mouth. I lick my lips in anticipation. The game is on.

The number of tax returns prepared some days sometimes boggles the mind. There have been a few days where the number claws close to 20. Complex returns slow the pace down to a crawl with some days only moving one, two or three returns from the stack. I hate those days. I want to serve as many clients as possible.

Preparing so many returns takes a team effort. Many returns have the bulk of the data already entered for me. I review most returns before they leave my office. You would not believe the shine a man with 30 plus years experience can put on a tax return.

I am too tired and exhausted to write a high quality blog post today. The well is empty. Monday another post is due and I am not sure what will be left to write. My mind is too focused on real tax returns to waste any speck of energy on a random idea in a blog post. Tuesday the race is over. I will take a day to relax and work around the farm. I’ll get a better post out later on Wednesday as I will have time to think and reflect.




After tax season I have a podcast to prepare for. Around May 1st I meet Jim Collins as he visits the fine State of Wisconsin.  In late May I am in Seattle speaking at Camp Mustache 4. I might have two sessions I speak at: one on anti-Mustachiamism (I didn’t know so many people would be interested in that) and a second as a comedy skit. We’ll see how my preparations go before the final commitment is made. Standup comedy is a lot more work than you can imagine.

Rather than keep rambling, I encourage you to read a few posts appropriate for this time of year for those of you going through withdrawal symptoms. (Gawd, that Wealthy Accountant guy can sure spin a fine tale.) (Note: I am not conceited. Just tired as hell and getting a bit punchy.)

Knowing When Not to do it Yourself is a good start. Here is a post on filing an extension to pay and/or file your taxes. A word of warning: When tax season reached its conclusion last year and I wrote, egads, about tax stuff, I received a very nasty letter telling me how much I suck and that used to be such a great writer but now suck completely. I think the guy left a comment too. Go check it out.

For five days sleep will come in fits. The taste coats my dry mouth. The release when it is over is like nothing else you can experience.

Don’t cry for me, however. I am doing exactly what I love doing. This is what I want; this is what makes me feel alive. The numbers. The game. Some people desire retirement so they can travel, fish or golf. Except for that year I spent as a janitor, ah, custodian, I have never worked a day in my life. It isn’t work when you have this much fun.

Tired is a good feeling. Then the anticipation builds slowly all year until the holidays arrive. Then the sickness sets in hard again. The addict is ready for his next fix.



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The One Guaranteed High-Return Investment You Don’t Own

Every investment, even guaranteed ones, require priming the pump. Before you get paid by your employer you work; before you get paid a dividend or receive capital gains you must invest in the index fund first; before you get paid rent you need to buy the property and prepare it for tenants; before guaranteed government bonds pays you a penny in interest you must first buy the bond. You only get something out if you first put something in. This is true in every part of your life.

I grew up on a farm and after a few years living in town I moved back to the countryside where I feel happiest. Town still has a magical pull. Living in town means everything I need is close by. I can bike everywhere. The need for a car when living in town is minimal. If I lived in town I wouldn’t own a car. For long trips I would rent a vehicle. Uber, my bike and legs would handle 99% of my transportation needs.

Living on a small farm has advantages. The cost of living further from town is offset by the amount of free food, or nearly free food, I get. Raising my own meat (beef, chicken, fish and pork) means I know what is in it. Abundant garden produce means healthy living while the crops are in season. Asparagus in spring, radishes and other fast growing vegetables follow, and apples, apricots, cherries, peaches (yes, peaches in Wisconsin!) and grapes round out the abundant autumn harvest. There is so much good food and it is all free or nearly so. Too bad it doesn’t last all year round.

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Frugality the Right Way

My last blog post was a disaster. In an attempt to gain some breathing room I accepted my first guest post without proper vetting. An astute reader quickly realized the guest was promoting a debt consolidation service. I should have known better.

My reasoning was sound; execution needed work. Tax season is getting long in the tooth and I am exhausted from the long hours. Hoping to divert some time from writing to tax work, I allowed the enemy behind the lines. My promise to you, kind readers, is to up my game. I like the idea of guest posts, but I think it would be best if I invited bloggers I know and trust to do the writing.

That said, I have no intentions of reducing my writing output. You come here to listen to my stories and glean my words for valuable advice you can take back home.

Success is a poor educator. When things are going good—and life has been very good to me—I/we start to believe we are smarter than we really are. It takes a solid kick to the crotch to focus attention. As bad as the last post was, a lesson was to be learned you are not aware of: my traffic was rather good! For a terrible guest post I had a high level of traffic. I take that to mean people were attracted to the title: frugality. I decided I should write the guest post intended for you.Continue reading

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